so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
