If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
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