"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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