I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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