The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
