all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Randomize
