I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
