You really coming over, don't trick.
We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Randomize