Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Randomize
