It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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