Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize