he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
