it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
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We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
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Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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