Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch