Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Randomize
Follow @tfln