Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I'm both gender and math confused
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
