sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize