VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
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i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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