Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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