Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
