chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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