so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
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