Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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