im drinking this country out of the recession.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
