So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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