Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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