You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes