he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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