plz talk dirty to me
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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