I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Where did you get a picture of my penis
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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