sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
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