I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
