We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
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