so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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