Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Randomize
