I got chris browned last night
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
