i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
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