I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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