Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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