didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
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