I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
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