Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
