sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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