this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
