Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
