Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I think your dad took our porno
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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