Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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