so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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