highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
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