It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
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