I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize
