Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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